End-Of-Life Archives - Page 2 of 3

How to Write Your Own Eulogy

Posted on March 30, 2018

Only you can tell your story from your point of view. So, it comes as a surprise that many people have no written recounting of their life. In addition, it is sometimes easier to keep certain thoughts and feelings secret until you have passed away, but if you have taken no steps to memorialize how you want to deal with your loose ends, your unfinished business will remain unfinished. Remember the difference between a Eulogy and an Obituary: An Obituary is often an objective, somewhat-cold fact-based notice of your death; a Eulogy is a speech at your funeral meant to paint a picture of who you really were. A good Eulogy contains the following chapters: Origin: When

Life-Draining Probate? It’s Probably the Court’s Fault

Posted on March 14, 2018

There are many, many attorneys who are not experienced in handling New York Surrogate’s Court cases or qualified to handle anything except the easiest Probate. This article isn’t about them. This article is about how an agonizingly-long, Probate of a Will is most likely the Court’s fault. New York’s Surrogate’s Court used to be the Unified Court System’s neat china doll in a house full of dirty toys: Every clerk in every county was professional, smart and helpful (except Queens County, they were awful), Probates moved forward quickly, and questions were answered on the spot. Yes, certain counties did things “their way” (I.e. NOT the way the Surrogate’s Court Procedures Act outlines how Probate should be administered), but not

Don’t Leave Money to Charity Using Your Will

Posted on December 28, 2017

Charities receive some of their largest gifts upon the passing of a benefactor. While this is a kind gesture on your part, if you live in New York you should leave money to your preferred charity using any method other than your Will. Probate is Annoying: Probating a Will requires New York’s involvement, meaning Probate can be an expensive, tedious and slow process. You will need to both place the charity on notice that they are a beneficiary under the Will, send them their funds, and procure a Release from the charity. All of this takes time, meaning an attorney is billing for all of this. Attorney General’s Involvement: As if New York’s courts weren’t inefficient enough for

What and When Should I Tell My Kids?

Posted on September 5, 2017

Parents who have gone through the estate planning process typically ask what information they should share with their children and when. The answer requires balancing many factors, but can be boiled down to a simple concept: Take responsibility and own up to your decisions, and don’t leave it to your kids to fight about it. First, if a child has been left out of a Will or is receiving less money than other siblings you may want to tell them so, and why. Clearly this is not a universal approach, but taking responsibility and informing them up-front allows the child to reconcile this fact. This will also help minimize your other children having to deal with the dispossessed child’s bitterness

“Name That Witness” (to Your Will)

Posted on May 24, 2017

When you execute your Will you MUST have it witnessed by at least two competent adults who are not beneficiaries in the Will. When you die New York’s Surrogate’s Courts require the names of the witnesses to be listed in the Probate Petition. And so it is nothing short of stupefying to me how many Wills have witness signatures that are completely illegible. This is somewhat understandable if you execute your own Will, since non-attorneys are not in the business of drafting Wills. The signers of illegible signatures are also more easily identified in the event it was the Testator’s friends or neighbors who signed (and thus the identities of the witnesses are more easily deduced). But many attorneys’ witnesses

“Don’t Forget About BoBo: Pet Trust for Your Animal Companion”

Posted on May 16, 2017

One of my dearest aging clients have a dog named Bo Bo. Bo Bo is a true companion to this couple: They are in their 90s and have outlived many of their friends, the husband is more mobile than his wife and likes to get physical activity by walking Bo Bo, and the dog is absolutely in love with them. Bo Bo also smells bad, barks at the littlest disturbance, is a manic that constantly jumps on visitors, (and gets slobber and fur on my suit, which needs to be dry cleaned after every single visit) and is begrudgingly tolerated (at best) by anyone other than my clients. Unfortunately, when my clients pass to the eternal human boneyard, Bo Bo’s

5 Times You DON’T Pay a Deceased Person’s Credit Card Bill

Posted on May 8, 2017

The weeks immediately following a family member’s death is tense, emotional and stressful; many people rush to handle the departed person’s affairs. This includes paying the deceased person’s debts, since every credit card company comes out of the woodwork the moment the card is cancelled by the survivors. However, many family members pay these bills even though they had no responsibility to do so. Here are 5 instances when you should NOT pay a deceased person’s debts: Retirement Plans: Remember that your retirement plans are protected from most creditors, including credit cards. If the decedent died with only retirement plan assets remaining in his name, tell this to the credit card company and don’t pay them anything.

The Top 5 Things to Do When a Family Member is Terminally Ill

Posted on April 14, 2017

Watching a person’s last days of life is often a horrible, gut-wrenching process. The dying individual may or may not be able to communicate, and the trauma of seeing a loved one approaching their end makes it difficult for spectators to make decisive decisions. But no matter what the case, if you want to do what is best for your family, you must utilize the precious remaining days of your loved one’s life to take action on certain items, as these matters get much more difficult and stressful upon his or her passing. Figure Out Funeral Arrangements: May people have funeral plots or pre-paid burial arrangements, but these details are often not formally shared with family and friends beforehand. If the

Medicaid Pitfalls: Cash Value Life Insurance

Posted on March 10, 2017

Qualifying for Medicaid can be a pain in the neck: You can only qualify for benefits if you have a limited amount of assets and income. Yes, there are some exceptions, but in most cases there are financial limits. Unfortunately, people’s past investment decisions may severely impact their current eligibility. One of the worst former financial decisions for Medicaid planning is the limits placed on cash value life insurance. “Permanent” life insurance is meant to last until you reach age 95 or 100, then pay out to you or your beneficiary even if you are still alive. These policies allow you to invest extra money to the policy’s “cash value” so that as the annual cost of the insurance

Naming Beneficiaries: When to Start (and Stop) Asking “What If?”

Posted on February 17, 2017

My mentor was a meticulous, forward-thinking attorney. When she retired from private practice I succeeded her and took over her client files. As a result, I had the pleasure of reading many of the wills she had drafted (not a recommended activity for narcoleptics who don’t want to fall asleep). She was absolutely scrupulous when it came to naming contingent beneficiaries to an estate. For some of her clients, and indeed for me too at times, it seemed like a maddening process. Here is a common scenario: I imagine going to an attorney to draft my Will, create beneficiary designation forms, and consider creating a trust. Now comes the moment of truth: When I pass away, who gets what?